PREVIOUSLY ON THE ADVENTURES OF ANONYMOUS YOSHI...
You know this relationship reminds me of a young kid who's name was ***** who had a...
Ehhhhh..... Nobody cares.
Anonymous Yoshi: You could win a trip to Los Angeles for E3. YESSSS!!!!!! YESSSSS!!!!!!!
Yoshiette: Read the Back of the bag!!!!
AY: Nutritional Facts...
YE: NOT THERE, THE BOTTOM RIGHT!!!!!
AY: No purchase necessary, sweepstakes ends May 10 2013.
YE: THE CONTEST IS EXPIRED!!!!
AY: Can you do this week's blog, I'm exhausted from the Dairanger review.
YE: NO, YOU DO IT, I'M GOING TO LA TO GO TO E3!!!!! DID I ALSO MENTION I'M GOING TO BE ROCKING OUT MY YOKO LITTNER STYLE BIKINI?!
AY: ERMAHGERD, CAN I COME WITH YOU?!
YE: Sorry, There wasn't enough money in my savings account for three badges.
AY: Who's the second badge for?
YE: PK Chu.
AY: Can I take his badge? Do you hate me? Can I party with you in your Yoko Bikini? Can I...
YE: YOSHI, STOP ASKING QUESTIONS YOU ALREADY KNOW THE ANSWER TO!!!!
So I tired myself out my last blog, so for this blog I'm going to do something more relaxed. By relaxed I mean I'm going to yell at you in text form while Yoshiette is on her "None of my Business Business tip, anyway onto the blog.
E3 is almost here and nothing really impressed me this generation other than the 3DS. Maybe this year's E3 will change that. Let's put it this way E3 2012 was boring as grey. I'm pretty sure it was like that because they got a LOT of negative publicity during late 2011, VERY early 2012, thanks to them supporting Political internet destruction. The ESA might as well have went to their investors "Well, thanks for Boycotting our products and events, so due to that we're not showing anything worth value this year, sorry folks. :(" As far as 2012, nothing standout came as far as games. It's pretty safe to say 2012 was a pretty crappy year for games. But what are my thoughts on the new consoles? Find Out Today.
First off The Wii U. The Wii U has the most potential exclusives. Zelda U, Super Mario U, Smash Bros U, Bayonetta 2, Game & Wario, Pikmin 3, Dragon Quest X, Wonderful 101, Deus Ex: Human Revelation Director's Cut, Sonic Lost Worlds (most of which will be shown off at E3), but Most of them are the same franchises that Nintendo's known for, and the Wii U isn't that innovative compared to the Wii, DS, and even the 3DS. Seriously, the controller's just the bottom half of the 3DS with an extra stick and triggers. I hear that not many people are big fans of the Big N right now, from being Copyright Zealous, to not including HD sooner, to having a relatively small E3 presence this year, to not even having a DVD drive in their Wii U. I'll be honest with you, The Wii U is the only real Home console in 8th generation that feels like an actual game console (more on that later). I don't know about you, but as far as the actual game consoles go, I'm rooting for the Wii U the most. It just needs that killer app to dominate all the competition, Going to take my idea Nintendo? As far as the 3DS, keep up the good work, keep releasing games for it, and hopefully you don't kill it.
Next, Sony's Playstation 4, Yes It could have more exclusives than Nintendo knowing Sony, But right now, all it has is Knack (which is just Sony's proposed mascot that'll probably fall into obscurity like Crash, Ratchet & Clank, and Sackboy), Killzone (which is just another FPS that's probably not going to be Game of the Year material, like it's predecessors), Infamous (which I don't care for), Drive Club (Driving Game), and Hohokum (which is a hard game to describe). The big push of the PS4 is... SOCIAL MEDIA!!!!! Check in with games, stream games, connect your PSN Account to Twitter or Facebook, and it sucks. Seriously, the last 3 Playstations used High tech new media formats for their selling point, and the new media their showing off is digital media, yeah... I know the cloud's coming, but I'm going to miss box art, the weight that comes from holding a disc or a cartridge, and putting the game into the console. Overall, Sony, pretty good job, but flawed, now do something about the Vita or set a burial site for it.
Finally onto the XBOX One, ugh... First off the name, Really, One, call it anything else, you won't confuse it with the XBOX Classic, I KNOW that it's an all in one system, but call it the XBOX Ultimate if you have to. Second the Kinect, Yeah a peripheral people used for a week, then it went to the bargain bins, now it's big brother. Does Microsoft want to see it's consumers naked that bad? Then go to Google, and find someone actually willing to be Naked on camera. NOT ONLY THAT, BUT IT'S REQUIRED, so if you lose it or it breaks, it's Useless. Next non gaming features, like Skype, TV, Netflix, this is more prevalent than the actual games (which consists of FPS games, Racing Games, and Quantum Break), REALLY? Great, MORE FEATURES PEOPLE ARE GOING TO USE FOR A WEEK, THEN FORGET ABOUT!!!! Game consoles have so many extra features that they're not game consoles anymore, THEY'RE MULTIMEDIA DEVICES!!!!! THAT'S NOT THE ONLY PROBLEM, USED GAME FEES, MANDATORY ONLINE, AND NO BACKWARDS COMPATIBILITY!!!!! I HOPE THIS CONSOLE DIES IN A FIRE!!!!! I MEAN IT!!!!!!
So yeah, Nintendo is the best console maker right now, but they're stuck in kind of a rut. That's not counting other consoles like the Ouya, but they have more of a chance of full survival than the big three. So is anyone ready for the video game crash of 201X (whenever it happens).
So let's pray that everyone can turn their A game up at this year's E3, but I want to hear what surprises you want to see this year, Maybe a Pokemon Console RPG (like Pokemon Colosseum), maybe an F-Zero game for the Wii U or 3DS, Earthbound collection for 3DS, maybe another Jak and Daxter game, Maybe a surprise from Rare (Like another Conker or an ACTUAL Banjo Kazooie game), maybe just me. What surprises do you want to see this year?