Sunday, September 20, 2015
My quick thoughts on the new Fantastic Four Movie (AKA Fant4stic A)
WHO'S RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS? WHO? WHO?!?!
Remember how Galactus being a cloud as as bad as a Fantastic 4 movie could get? Yeah they managed to top this by many miles... It's one of the worst Super Hero Movies in recent memory, Right up there with Green Lantern. I admit as mediocre as the original fantastic four movies were, you could at least see the passion, enthusiasm, and energy in it, Fant4stic A has none of that. It was pretty much made (and rushed) to Get Marvel to Leave them alone and stop asking for their toys back for a little while longer. Some one at Fox decided that making a gritty reboot of a comic that wasn't meant to be dark was the most logical idea, Because that is such a good idea and worked out so well for the fellows at Warner Bros and Sony... /s. What's the story? Basically Reed Richards spends years building a teleporter that transfers matter to another dimension (or another Planet, It can't make it's mind what it is, did anyone proofread this before it was released), and he get's a scholarship from generic scientist who happens to be the father of 2 of the mains of he film. He and Ben Grimm are joined by Victor von Doom, Johnny and Sue Storm and they get sent to this planet when a bigger version of the teleporter gets finished. They get superpowers later and only now does it feel like a Fantastic Four Movie. Most of the film feels like a science fiction film rather than a super hero film. It doesn't help that the characters are 2 dimensional and make you not give a crap about these bozos since they're all generic teen highschool movie fodder. Doctor Doom may have been kind of OP in the comics, but in this film, He's pretty much God, which wasn't in the Fantasic Four comics. The Characters look nothing like they do in the comics, I could forgive them making the human torch a black guy, but i can't forgive them changing the suits to look like the Ultraman X Xio suits, or how about making Doctor Doom look like a guy in a morphsuit who hung out at a nuclear power plant to long, or even having them making The Thing have a outline of his Balls and his Ass when walking. The world isn't espcially big since there's like only 4 or 5 environments, not to mention there's like one action scene in this entire Action Movie, ant they couldn't do that right. even for all the small cosmetic things there's a aserious lack of logic to this movie, like aforementioned planet vs dimension thingy, and the fact at the very beginning of the movie Ben and Reed didn't want to be friends anymore, yet the very next scene their friends again, maybe they'll explain this all in the sequels... Oh wait, I forgot this won't be getting ANY Sequels... I'll be blunt it was so bad that I bet Fox didn't want you to know this film exists until the beginning of this year. I give this train wreck of a movie half a altered The Thing out of 4 and the Official Anonymous Yoshi seal of SUCK!!!!!
Let's congratulate Marvel for finally getting heir Toys back earlier than usual...