Saturday, August 16, 2014

In the jungle you must wait, until the dice roll 5 or 8. Jumanji Review (AKA YET ANOTHER ROBIN WILLIAMS TRIBUTE).

I admit If I can watch Jumanji (or possibly Aladdin) the same way that I used to, Why can't I watch a JewWario video the same way even after over half a year. That's a question I doubt anyone, even myself, has the answer to. but What do I think of the Robin Williams movie that I had the most attachment to? Find out today...




STORY:

The story is basically this, In 1869, two guys buried a board game because it was cursed. 100 years later Alan Parrish finds the game and he starts playing it with Sarah Whittle who accidentally rolls the dice and S**t starts rolling down hill. Alan gets trapped in the game for 26 years until 2 kids named Judy and Peter start playing the game and the whole town gets into trouble by turning into an African safari. With such a killer premise like that, How come people don't remember it for anything other than mindless spectacle. While the story is pretty good and stakes are high, it's essentially a ripoff of Jurassic Park, but with African Animals and Hazards instead of dinosaurs, but honestly as far as ripoffs of popular movies go, I've seen worse, *Cough* almost every video game movie in existence *cough*.


CHARACTERS:

Alan Parrish was the kid who got bullied by kids at his school or whatever, he has to deal with his past in then present 1995, when Van Pelt starts shooting at him and hunting hem down. Sarah Whittle goes through having to play the game even though she doesn't want to. Judy and Peter Shepard are the kids who find the Jumanji Game and they don't really contribute anything of value since most of the focus is Alan Parrish trying to stop the monster he created 26 years ago.


PRESENTATION:

This is the film's strongest point, it has big scale effects that might look dated now, but it recreates the danger of going through the African wildland. Some of the jokes and scenes are entertaining, like the monkeys watching Wizard of Oz and going crazy afterwards. There's also a scene that has a very Home Alone vibe, I won't tell you what it is, but if you watched the film, you'll know.


HAS IT HELD UP?

Short answer, Not really, It's not bad by any means, but it's honestly really forgettable if you didn't watch it a million times like I did over the years. Seriously, try to remember anything in the movie other that it had awesome effects. But It's worth at least one watch, if for nothing else to see something other than years of board games and toys being turned into big budget schlock and you want to see a movie about board games. I give this 3 Jumanji Board Games out of 4.


Now back to the story...




A. Yoshi: Why is this world changing?

Yoshiette 1: Because The universe is getting rebooted to start going back to doing one off storylines, instead of having a epic story that probably won't be completed.

Duck Nukem: At least that way you won't destroy precious brain cells by doing what everyone else is doing.

AY: OH MY GOD!!!!! THANK YOU ARCEUS MIYAMOTO CHRIST!!!!!!

*AMC Winks*

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