Friday, July 7, 2017

My quick thoughts on Spider-Man: Homecoming


This movie's A HUGE DISAPPOINTMENT! it's not bad, but it's the first MCU Movie since Iron Man 2 that felt like I got Jipped.

I have to give credit where credit where it's due, they didn't tell the same origin story like the First movies of the original 2 Spider-Man movie Franchises, and it at least tries to take the best of both Spider-Man series, it has the camp from the original comics of the Sam Raimi movies, and the attitude, but the one of the biggest problems of this movie is It's terrible pacing, the movie Shifts into Turbo for 5 minutes then slows down at least down by 8x for like 15 minutes then the cycle starts on and on for for like 2 hours and you essentially go "What the Falkner did I just watch?" The story is extremely forgettable up to the level that all you remember is the pacing problems. I do like the implementation of Captain America & Iron Man (as well as that Stan Lee cameo (Marvel, I know this'll sound disrespectful, but you may want to go easy on Stan Lee cameos, you want to keep the guy ready to turn 100 before he dies(), as sort of nod of continuity, but all they are in the movie is to hold Peter Parker's (who we'll get to in just a couple sentences) hand... This is the point where I bring up the Vulture, but there's not much to bring up, he's just there, the part which pisses me off is his costume, it's too....... Power Rangers-ey. you could say the same thing about Green Goblin from The original Spider-Man, but at least it wasn't afraid to take liberties to it could stay as close to the original comic as possible (unlike the CRAPPY ASS GREEN GOBLIN FROM THE "AMAZING" MOVIES (YOU MAY'VE BEEN MENACING BUT I LIKED NEW GOBLIN FROM SPIDER-MAN 3 MORE!!!!!!!!!)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My solution, put chest armor with wings (a la Red Wild Force ranger's Battlizer) on the bastard. Peter Parker was so bad in this movie I came crying for Spider-Cullen back, at least he had some sense of a personality, MCU Spider-Man has all the personality of a blade of grass. I hate how they treated Spider-Man's suit, it's like they tried to make Iron Man 4, but realized Spider-Man needs a movie, and they took elements of Iron Man and put it into the Spider Man Suit!!!!!!!!! GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You have the web wings, save that BS if/when Spider-Man decides to use the Iron Spider... Most of the rest of the production is good (music choices, some of the funnier jokes, and the action, etc.) but they're harder to comment on without getting Nasty Comments about how I spoiled the movie... *Sigh* What a disappointment, it's not bad, just average and forgettable. When It's good it was great, when it was PAINFUL (like getting your wisdom teeth pulled out painful, I speak from experience)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quality wise, It's between Iron Man 2 and Incredible Hulk, with Hulk being the better movie. and Iron Man 2 being the worse one, but none of these are as garbage as Guardians of the Galaxy 1 (at least to me, go ahead and enjoy what I Can't Enjoy (second one's better BTDubs)). I give this 2.25 Vulture Suits out of 4.

Oh my thoughts on Wonder Woman and Iron Fist.

"Meh, it was okay, 2.5 out of 4"

"Didn't get interesting until the last 3rd, 1.75 out of 4"

Guess which adaptation fits into what verdict... Other Comic Book movies I saw that didn't get reviewed here are on Facebook or Twitter. AnonymousYoshi on both of them.

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